Man.....
I never wanted to commit suicide that badly since past few years. Everything is just never as it sees. Everything is just wrong about me. I just never get what I really want. I never did give effort for what I want. Everything is just no luck for me. Nothing is ever meant for me. I'm just a toal loser. Everything about me is just ZERO. I'm so god damn despair of myself. i don't feel alive anymore. I never did feel worthy ever since I was born. Everyone just keeping receive better things, but for me is just so impossible. I really don't want to live anymore...
God, please help me?...
我不该要有的东西
今天，我觉得蛮高兴的。
首次能与她如此亲近地交流。
而且我在不知不觉还被她赞扬了几句（虽然我不知道那是否出至于真心）。
已快接近五年的时间了……
一千八百天左右，一端非常长久的日子。
第一次，从小学至今，第一次暗恋一位女生那么久，连我自己也搞不清楚为什么会这样。周围可爱漂亮的女生如此繁多，我怎么就只暗恋她一位呢？！
喂！老天爷，我可是一位非常健康热血的青少年也！
我不是应该每看见一位容颜清秀漂亮又可爱的女生就暗恋一位的吗？！为什么我只能暗恋她呀？！
第一次，没胆子向一位女生说我暗恋她！！
天啊！我怎么那么没胆子呢？！哎……
我以为，日子久了，我便不再迷恋她了。
但怎么知道，要忘记她，要怎么说呢……
这五年来，我都一直办不到。
她还是一位交过了非常多男朋友的，我怎么可能会喜欢上她那一种人呢？！
但能怎么办，我就是这样暗恋了她快五年得时间。
如果就能够再一次，就再一次，能够跟她聊天……
我喜欢你……
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